Thursday, January 30, 2014

31 Days + Tuesday's dermatologist appt.

One month has already passed since I stopped my steroid usage.  Thank goodness!  That's one month closer to healthy skin!  It's already felt like a huge emotional roller coaster thus far and I'm praying that I can continue to push through this battle with strength and a positive attitude.

Tuesday's appointment with the new dermatologist went basically as expected--no new insights or answers. She does, however, seem to be more caring/understanding than my most recent dermatologist and is open to me making the decisions about which steps I would like to pursue within my own healing process.  So that's comforting.

Although she gave me a prescription for a stronger steroid and for ProTopic, she said (numerous times) that it is completely my choice if I want to get the prescription filled or not.  She said that she understands if I decide to push through without steroids or immunomodulators.  In addition, she did say that she thinks I'd be a good candidate for Phototherapy, which sounds like something I might like to pursue.  (If any other TSW-ers have tried this, would you mind sharing your thoughts on phototherapy with me???)  The other options that she presented (steroids, immunomodulators)..... no way.  Must not/will not mess with any more drugs and prolong the inevitable.  I must let my body heal itself.  I'm not interested in those "quick fixes" and will stay the course that I've embarked upon.

That's basically the news on that front.


  1. Congrats on your one month! Hang in there. It will get easier. I had to pull on my faith in God ALOT in my early months and still do of course. On story from the Bible that struck a cord with me was about the woman who had been bleeding for years and had tried everything. Nothing healed her. When she heard about Jesus, she knew if she could just get to him she would be healed. She got to him and touched his robes and was healed. He said to her "Daughter, your faith has healed you. Go in peace and be freed from your suffering." (Mark 5:34) For me this verse got me through some dark times early in my withdrawal journey. But I fully felt that if I trusted God, he would heal me. And he has been! Six months in and doing much better. I still have a long way to go, but I am much more comfortable. I hope your doing okay. You can do this!!
    ps stay away from Protopic. Im withdrawing from it. Its evil! lol :)

    1. Thanks so much for your lovely note and for sharing the story from Mark 5. I was just thinking about that story the other day, actually.... but, in all honestly, I wasn't thinking about it in the right way--I was thinking, "man, if I could just 'touch' Jesus and my symptoms would disappear? That'd be so easy!!! I believe it would work! I believe it would heal me that instantly! Why can't that be an option for me?!" Of course, that solution is impossible for many reasons, but that mindset really shows my wrong-thinking exactly, doesn't it? I'm still wishing for the quick fix (which is impossible) and the easiest road.... instead of trusting fully that God is taking care of me as I "walk through the valley" and that I WILL be healed one day. That I must remain patient and learn to fully rely on Him during this difficult time. This whole process of TSW is more about the 'daily bread', isn't it? Just like what you wrote about in your most recent post... taking one day at a time. Knowing that God heals us (and has given us a body that WILL heal itself) in time. And, it's not just about the physical healing--we have emotional and spiritual healing that comes out of our physical suffering. I need to think about that Bible story with the right mindset. It should be a comfort to me (like it is for you) and not another reason to say "Why me?! Why am I left to suffer?" In time, we will all be healed! Thank you so much for the reminder. :)

  2. Stacey, yay for us on a whole month already!! :)

    On the topic of Phototherapy, I do not know exactly what it entails, as the last time I looked into it, my insurance did not cover it so I really didn't go much further. I have researched it a little more recently and discovered that tanning beds are essentially a cheaper alternative. There is the risk of burning if you stay in too long, but I have found that my skin really improves when I go tanning for 10 minutes a day. I started off with 5 a day and worked my way up, if you are very fair skinned you may benefit from 5 a day. Something to think about!

  3. I agree, treatment that are said to be an easier way, or as you said it ‘quick fixes”, is really not something to depend on. It’s always better to stay in a treatment that may take a while, but has an efficient and reliable result. Anyway, one month is a good progress. I hope you’re doing and feeling better now 2 months after.


  4. Hello, I has been 3 years. What happened? Is everything ok?

    1. Hi Saul,

      Long story! I haven't felt up to writing posts because I made the most terrible mistake--after almost one complete year of TSW, I went back on topical steroids for just 2 weeks around Christmas 2014. I felt like I was in heaven for the first few days but then my skin suddenly started crawling and feeling unbearable again after just 1 week of being on steroids again. But I kept using them until after Christmas.

      Well.... I can say with absolute assurance that it was the biggest mistake of my life.

      I then went into an even worse withdrawal than the first year. WAY worse.

      Not counting the year (2014) that I started this blog, I'm now at 26 months TSW and finally doing much better. I'm not completely out of the woods yet but my life is feeling pretty normal most days!

      Thanks for your message. I'll try to collect my thoughts about all of this and update the blog with an official post sometime soon.

      Are you currently in TSW?