Although 2 years ago wasn't the actual beginning of my journey with skin issues, it was the time when things first started spiraling out of control for me. I've had difficulties with my skin for my entire life, however that was the definitive turning point in which my problems began to shift from "minor annoyance" to "huge problem."
But who could have foreseen this? How could I have possibly known that this would stretch on for so long? That the redness, the constant irritation and inflammation would still be going today? That--for every second of every day--my body and mind would be plagued with an unstoppable and unquenchable itch?
From my viewpoint, this has been going on for far too long. I have suffered so long and so hard. When I think about how incredibly long each and every day feels like in the midst of suffering, I can hardly believe that I've endured this for over two years now. That's at least 730 days of nonstop itchiness. How can a person even tolerate something so wretched for so long? Yet here I stand. Because I'm alive and I have no choice in the matter. This is the hand that I've been dealt. Until it passes, I will continue to wage these heavy waters.
Very few people will ever know exactly what I've endured or what these skin problems actually feel like, physically (and emotionally). In fact, I have a feeling that whenever this finally passes--someday soon or someday far away--that I'm going to downplay the suffering that I'm currently experiencing. That I won't even be able to imagine what these current pains feel like anymore. And that's okay, I think. The ignorance is probably even going to be an enormous blessing, by that point.
But, for now, I'm starting to need an outlet to vent. An outlet to write down my thoughts and feelings surrounding this entire experience. I might think of it as a diary or journal on somedays. Or use it to document photos on other days. Or it could even be a medical or dietary record place. Only time will tell, I suppose.
To close this introduction, I'm a person who prays and believes that God works through all things for good. I believe that--and have already seen--many precious things will come out of this difficult journey. Sure, I have gotten depressed along the way--and I surely will again--but let my hope prevail. Let my faith stand firm.
...we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us. --Romans 5:3-5